The compass: Four Inner States That Transform Challenges Into Growth
Some time ago,
I read something that deeply resonated with me. It said that in any situation, we can choose to be in one of three states: acceptance, satisfaction, or enthusiasm. I believe it was either Eckhart Tolle or Deepak Chopra who spoke about these being levels of consciousness we can operate from. The idea stuck with me. It made me reflect on my own life and how I’ve dealt with adversity, change, and discomfort. But over time, through personal experiences, some deeply painful, others incredibly liberating, I realized there was a missing first step in this trio. Before acceptance can even happen, something more fundamental must occur: surrender.
This insight led me to what I now believe are the four inner states we move through when facing any challenge:
1. Surrender
This is the moment when we stop resisting what is. It’s the quiet decision to release the inner battle. Not giving up, but letting go. It’s the crack where the light first enters. Surrender is not weak, it’s wildly courageous. It says, “I don’t know what happens next, but I’m done fighting the present moment.”
In my own life, I’ve noticed that whenever I hold on tightly, whether it’s to an identity, a plan, a person, or an outcome: I suffer. But the moment I surrender, space opens up. It’s like unclenching a fist after holding it too tight for too long.
2. Acceptance
Once we surrender, acceptance naturally begins to bloom. We stop arguing with reality. We stop saying, “This shouldn’t be happening.” And we begin to say, “Okay, this is what is. What now?”
Acceptance doesn’t mean we approve or agree, it simply means we stop resisting. We drop into presence. And in that space, we can breathe again.
3. Satisfaction
With continued presence, we begin to notice small sparks of contentment. We see that even in difficulty, there are moments of beauty. Gratitude. Peace. Lessons.
Satisfaction doesn’t mean everything is perfect, but it does mean we can say, “I’m okay right here, right now.” It’s subtle but powerful. It brings a sense of groundedness even when things aren’t ideal.
4. Enthusiasm
And finally, if we stay open, a beautiful thing happens: enthusiasm returns. We feel inspired again. Energized. Ready to take aligned action.
This is the stage where we reconnect with purpose. We don’t push life, we dance with it. We become co-creators, not victims. Enthusiasm is the natural outpouring of someone who has moved through resistance, into acceptance, found peace, and is now ready to engage joyfully.
A Personal Reflection
Looking back, I see these four stages in almost every turning point in my life. Whether it was letting go of something I loved, stepping into uncertainty, or building something new, this sequence repeated itself.
It always started with surrender. Then came the steadying breath of acceptance. Then the gentle hum of satisfaction. And finally, the fire of enthusiasm.
This isn’t a rigid framework, sometimes we cycle back and forth, or skip stages, or linger longer in one than the other. But knowing that these inner states exist gives us a compass. A way to navigate the chaos with a little more grace.
So the next time life feels heavy, ask yourself:
Where am I right now?
And if you’re not in acceptance, satisfaction, or enthusiasm yet, maybe you just need to surrender first. With love,